twelve things celebrated in january

one. january fourth. willy wonka's trademark was registered in nineteen seventy-two. find a theater showing the film and watch it on the big screen. also find a golden ticket and give that and your favorite willy wonka candy to the box office cashier.

so the river oaks theater in houston had two midnight showings of this film. i'd forgotten about the first. i'd hoped i could stay up late enough to watch the second, but my days of staying up late have long since passed. i DID go to the theater and deliver the ticket and the candy to a cashier and bought a ticket for her to pass on to someone interested in watching the film.

two. january fifth. home of the whopper was trademark registered in nineteen sixty-five. find the oldest burger king restaurant in your neck of the woods and treat yourself to a whopper meal without modifying the order (like i always do... unless you have food allergies, of course).

three. january ninth. campbell's soup's trademark was registered in nineteen six. find your local food bank and deliver nineteen dollars worth of campbell's soups to them.

four. january thirteenth. mickey mouse cartoon first appeared in newspapers throughout the united states in nineteen thirty. visit your local library and find a copy of that cartoon.

i visited a library and sought the assistance of a reference librarian who was unable to find the thing, and i, not being THAT interested in finding it, opted to cancel the search.

five. january sixteenth. jim henson's copyright claim on kermit the muppet was renewed in nineteen eighty-four. find and view the muppets take manhattan, released that year.

THIS MOVIE WAS GODAWFUL BAD. WHY, WHY, WHY WAS THIS EVER MADE?

six. january eighteenth. lerner and lowe's musical motion picture my fair lady was registered in nineteen fifty-seven. find and view that film.

i watched this one a few years ago. if i could've found it in itunes, i would've made myself watch it again, but i couldn't so i didn't.

seven. january twentieth. the first outdoor feature-length talking motion picture, in old arizona, was made in nineteen twenty-nine. find and view that film, too.

ironically, itunes DID have this one available. i was kind of dreading watching this one because i thought it was going to be shit, but i liked the dude who played cisco kid and the ending.

eight. january twenty-first. john fitch, inventor of the steamboat, was born in seventeen forty-three. if it's at all feasible for you to do so, take a ride on a steamboat. if you can't, find some kind of a riverboat and take a ride on that. nine.

i was thinking of roadtripping it to louisiana or something, but then we had a fucking ice storm, complete with snow that managed to stick for a significant period of time. then i was thinking i'd go to san antonio or kemah or something... but i'm lazy. of the month's tasks, i was most interested in this one, but i was also interested in cleaning out the chaos that is my room. the chaos won.

january twenty-third. casablanca the film was copyrighted in nineteen forty-three. find and view that film, too.

i've seen this one before, too. several years ago, one of the theaters in town was showing it, and i figured i should watch it. i LOVE humphrey bogart and like ingrid bergman, and with all the fanfare for this film, i expected to like it. i did not.

a friend suggested i watch it and find three things i do like. so... i enjoy it up until the flashback to paris. it has moments of awesome throughout. the dialogue is really good in places. i actually think victor laszlo's the most admirable character, and i like that rick blaine does the right thing in the end.

but dude. that here's lookin at you, kid. i hate that line. and he says it WAY TOO MUCH.

ten. january twenty-ninth. lawrence hargrave, inventor of the box kite, was born in eighteen fifty. find a box kite. go fly it.

those things are a BITCH to fly, yall. don't bother.

eleven. january thirtieth. bell chimes were invented in fourteen thirty-seven. find a cool set of chimes and send them to someone, preferably a stranger because in my opinion giving to people you don't know makes the giving so much better.

twelve. january thirty-first. coca-cola registered its trademark for "nutrient or tonic beverages" was registered in eighteen ninety-three. find a bottle of coke with your name on it. enjoy!

GAH. there was a gas station that had GOBS of the named cokes. and when i went back to get one, THEY WERE GONE. and none of the others i checked had them either. people are selling them on amazon for like twenty bucks. no, thank you.